I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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