every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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