What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We are all done wearing pants today
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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