I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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