ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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