clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
