I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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