The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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