We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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