yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
i think i just lost a toe
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
