Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize