I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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