A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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