Texts From Last Night

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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood

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  (330): Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood http://tfl.nu/kses
  Replies (4) Good night (4052) Bad night (681)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives

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  (513): Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives http://tfl.nu/d9wq
  Replies (137) Good night (2590) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.

  (1-310): View more from California

  damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.

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  (310): kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley. (1-310): damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now. http://tfl.nu/1545
  Replies (65) Good night (2595) Bad night (3528)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.

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  (214): I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed. http://tfl.nu/5k49
  Replies (20) Good night (6858) Bad night (1276)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.

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  (814): I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer. http://tfl.nu/a96i
  Replies (33) Good night (1155) Bad night (3396)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  He managed to light the Jello on fire...

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  (251): He managed to light the Jello on fire... http://tfl.nu/tu7i
  Replies (16) Good night (5936) Bad night (1022)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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  (818): I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder. http://tfl.nu/z8u4
  Replies (50) Good night (6701) Bad night (2597)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.

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  (+44): You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack. http://tfl.nu/2spc
  Replies (12) Good night (4195) Bad night (1071)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?

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  (313): There's a paramedic out here, what have you done? http://tfl.nu/vsi3
  Replies (3) Good night (2867) Bad night (933)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.

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  (480): You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question. http://tfl.nu/us2j
  Replies (14) Good night (1872) Bad night (1056)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes

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  (902): Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes http://tfl.nu/0c3w
  Replies (4) Good night (1203) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on

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  (609): Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on http://tfl.nu/f543
  Replies (2) Good night (883) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.

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  (917): Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life. http://tfl.nu/kv1x
  Replies (11) Good night (767) Bad night (920)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.

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  (423): hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT. http://tfl.nu/qhme
  Replies (5) Good night (1776) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!

  (360): View more from Washington

  A cheater.

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  (360): If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me. (503): Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?! (360): A cheater. http://tfl.nu/8n8b
  Replies (20) Good night (1152) Bad night (439)

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