Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo