another moral hangover. fuck.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
