Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
