On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
