In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Where is the hickey?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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