come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
