need another drink. this is the easiest way
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
