Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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