I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
