You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
