...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Sext me about skeletons
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
My life is pants optional.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
