I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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