the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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