I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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