dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
is that a dick in a sweater?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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