No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
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She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
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I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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