Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
