You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
is it fun? or sober?
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