either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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