Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
