All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize