I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize