I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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