Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize