So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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