The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
