So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
