Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize