Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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