Whod you bang
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
The beer is more important than you right now.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
