you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
