I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
