just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
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