Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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