ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
