Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
