I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
