He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i think my mom watched the whole time
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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