PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
dude. I can hear the air.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
